woots.stuck with all the proj now,duno where i really am.hahas.is my target possible?
pretty lazy to blog now,cos of all the coming exams.
nowadays cant seem to really talk abt things on my mind with her.i seem to start to doubt her.whats happening?we are talking abt very superficial stuff,and im often mentioning abt stuffs in the 'banlist'.well,im sorry,but if you can accept me saying such stuffs.i guess ill be able to really tell you whats on my mind.
thats for now,will blog when im finishing on my studies.
miss you always,but do you really think of me?do you really feel me?do you rmb me?
be my sweetheart(: @ 11:21 PM
Thursday, May 21, 2009
hais.school nowadays is getting really boring..anw.came here to rant.
what is this kind of treatment?it doesnt seem like you trust me or will talk to me anymore.everything is like.im trying to hard to get something out of you.i know youre not obliged to reply.i know you dontwant to give me the reply.ill say it out here.ive changed,not the type you like anymore.i wont be accepted anymore because i appeal to you as attention seeking.or maybe worseoff,as someone whos bugging you nonstop.
well.think abt it.you actually spend more time playing some nonsence !@#$%^ games online then talking to me.you dont reply my smses.you dont even answer my calls.now tell me that im attention seeking.AFTER you realise that you are like.not bothering abt me.i ask you questions,and you do not actually answer me.im sick of asking.i have a limit to what i can do and give too okay.tell me if you dontwant me to talk to you.seriously.i always seem to talk to you,trying to be cheerful.i feel.like.im talking to a wall more often than not.and every night.i think and think,how to talk to you.so that you will reply.im breaking soon.
dont even think you will come here really.just go play your fbgames.since they are so fun to you.
i think youve changed.and i know you think ive changed.DONT SAY I MAKE TOO MUCH ASSUMPTIONS.its the truth,the difference i feel from you.the times i hear you say stuff abt yourself.seems like youre becoming too..proud.
/ends rant
be my sweetheart(: @ 11:46 PM
Monday, May 18, 2009
whoops.lagging behind like some crazy arse.got fa1 commskills boa pom and microecons.
none if which im really following up well.fa1 is cos have poa,still can understand.even so i dun think i can remember theory wise..
commskills got essay to write.hell of a long one for me.
boa.dun even know where the tchrs at now.
pom sleep in every tutorial,grp proj aso duno do what.
microecons,still okay ba.can understand what they are trying to say,except that i really feel that i cant catch up as fast as in the past..
and the worst part is im still dotaing LOL.maybe trying out the maple ep2.midsem test sure die woohoo~:X
went tj concert on sat.pretty nice,all the songs they played.:X shouting 'MT' like nobodys business.no prizes for guessing,those are initials :X anws.tio pangseh by junyuan and binghong,they went with bhce ppl.then dint eat in the end,ate with family near eunos mrt.
today was quite boring too.cos i wasnt feeling quite well.went to meet gareth cheepeng and yonghao lol.supposed to run with them but..leg cmi today.sorry buddies.then we went eat at some kopitiam.omg the bachormee sucks.totally.the vinegar tasted weird,the noodles was crappy.the meat was too soft.
then went to tampines1.sintec was not open,so cldnt get back the rackets.then we shopped arnd since yonghao wanted to get some presents.bought a heychain.pretty nice :X.then..we went to walk arnd.i want to buy the freaing mozaic. 4gb/pink.wonder when i can get it now,overspending as and when i feel like it.the next item i wld buy wld be the sonicgear earpiece,pink.LOL.
then we came back home by mrt.wanted to go by bus but was quite late alr,so no choice.then talked to her on msn before she went to audi.then she smsed me saying she injured her hand.and she was very pissed.LOL.so what exactly happened?lets make a guess.
some flowers in audi LOL.aiyo flowers only ma.why lyktt?
btw.zr ppl,i think we will have a outing on sat ba.mai pangseh hor.im off to bed.tmrs lesson is at 9 till 3.
collect racket.
settle boa grouping hope to get in somewhere nice.
buy stuff.
nights~
be my sweetheart(: @ 2:03 AM
Saturday, May 16, 2009
lols.today was a passable day..was in school until arnd 4+.then met junyuan.
we took 23 down to bugis(cos he was on the bus) and then we to lighthouse and ate.woots that was a nice meal thanks :X.then we went to park lane,played pool.then lan.then we played dm/gf.dint know that 'through the fire and the flames' came out on dmgf.nice pcs,except that it was uber hard.LOL and im super offform.the pool at parklane sucks..and so is the lan.lols..basically thats what we done throughout last year,so it felt kinda nostalgic.
talking abt nostalgic.i feel really helpless as to the r/s btwn me and her.its like.can feel close,yet i duno what this has become.there seems to be an invisible barrier built btwn us the past year.i have no idea how to break through it.or maybe its not just me alone.maybe i shld ignore this and move on.maybe i shld try try and try,cos it appears to mean so much to me.yet..i doubt i can do it.like i did in the past.leave it forever,leave it for now,try until i succeed.
guess i was selfish.guess i still am.hope that i can be understood,given a chance to explain myself and a chance to get tgt again.everything that i do now reminds me of her.what can i do?how can i salvage this.i was able to give her advice.but look at myself now.what am i?who am i?
im sorry.
be mine.
only.
forever.
be my sweetheart(: @ 1:34 AM
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
ops napped frm arnd 9+ until now..
zomg.this isnt really well..sick for weeks and now..omg.wldnt really think of this.
anws 2 days of school.well starting not to sleep in class alr.doesnt hang out with the class much anymore.not my kinda talking i guess..so just interact and not bother with it.lessons are getting even more boring.fa1 hasnt even starting doing g.ledger yet.seriously this is getting nowhere.and boa..i think im lagging behind aft reading those jokes on the forums.then monday night was dazu.pretty fun,but the song was boring.
then today.went to school at 1 to play pool.lols still suck at it,cos someone had to rush me eh.><><
aft that,hanged out with class for awhile.then took 291 to ahmas hse to pass xiaogu the rackets for restringing.woots its sure gna be nice on sat when i get it.^^ but even so.my left hand cant control the racket as well now.cos of my hand fracture.dammit why must that goddammed rollerblade have slanted wheels.now my left hand has no strength.and its abit smaller than my right.shld i play with my right hand?ohwell we'll see..
anws.to say this in case i dun get the chance to.
ily.
be my sweetheart(: @ 2:07 AM
Sunday, May 10, 2009
happy mothers day!hahas.
hais,anws nowadays dun really feel quite well,lagging behind in school.friday slept in econs lecture.1hr 30mins literally sleep through.also,played pool on friday and realised that i suck LOL.
then went for spco concert at night.they played songs like fen yong qian jin and mo li hua LOL.buden honestly wasnt very good.overall the concert was pretty boring.then went for supper with tpco ppl at bedok block85 foodctr until 1+.good thing the seniors can drive though.:X i wna learn,but have to wait till im 21.why does the government have to chg all the stuff on the 1992 batch?syllabus,olvls pushed forward,can only learn driving at 21.seriously.
then saturday wasnt exactly bad.but overspent like crap..now pok alr.
anws,hope that i can still do my fa1 without calculator.cos..well i misplaced mine.LOL.
be my sweetheart(: @ 2:51 PM
Thursday, May 7, 2009
cldnt sleep last night aft blogging.stayed up until 4am before i managed to sleep cos i was simply too tired.
wokeup at 845.lessons start at 9.OMG.i stepped into class at exactly 915.without breakfast.feeling empty,physically and mentally.i just cldnt think of anything anymore.usually ill be able to figure out stuff,but not today.same feelings as when i was in sec4 1mth before prelims.play play and play,yet i feel nth.think of nth.why has the feeling come back?hais seriously.if the feelings are not supposed to be here anymore,then just FUCK OFF.i dun nid this to be here at all.i feel alot better not having you.seriously.thanks.
SECRET.thanks.at least i know what it means now.ill try to change back to the past,the me before poly life started this year.but sometimes things just isnt as easy as pressing system restore on the computer isnt it.
anw,back to class times.cldnt help but fall asleep cos of the fact that im still tired,feeling empty and i slept for a miserable 5hrs.classmates,tchr.everyone was trying to keep me awake.i feel so bad myself.
give this piece of shit up now seriously.it WONT help.i used to know when i shld give up,and ill just stop thinking of it.but not now.
i wna start playing zr now,but i dunhave one at home.i wna take g8.hope i can make it,theres still half a year or sth.
really tired now,plus someones not answering my calls all the way.thanks to a mystical ORANGE SMILEY BEANY CUSHION.rofl.why are cancerians stubborn):
today was quite a lame day.wokeup at 10+.decided to snooze so..
*snooze*..
1115.LOL lessons starts at 12.omg rushed off.missed my commskills book for the 2nd time alr.then took bus 15 to tp.the journey was..REDLIGHT busstop REDLIGHT busstop REDLIGHT busstop REDLIGHT busstop ALL THE WAY TO TP.zomg my longest trip up ever.
then school..LOL.commskills part.starting was quite `sleepy mood` then minhui was like.PAY ATTN LAH LTR YOU DUNO WHAT TO DO AGAIN.lols ops kana scolding ley.then not bad,can tahan through commskills thanks to nagging froom my left *LOL* seriously nid stuffs like that to keep me awake.:X
then was apel lesson.moral of the day..
INTEGRITY.
thats seiously all that i rmb from the lesson.LOL.
then 1hr break.lols went to find cousin to get w3 client.am i going back to dotaing?doubt ill get too serious cos not in that kinda environment but who knows.
then..microecons lesson.seriously i think i break record alr,45min class aso can sleep seh wtf.
dint even know my class register number was 18.LOL.then mabel called 18.the tchr called someone else not me.then realised that he called the wrong number.tio sabo by allen kns.
nv do mcq,so look arnd for answer lor LOL.then call number 10 for the 3rd time,and fell asleep.zomg class leaving halfway then i wakeup pack bag.=.=
aft that was like eating with weilin LOL.eat duno what spagetti duno what name de LOL.then co practice fenzu.got some strange ppl..woots.
then play what fei tian.LOL quite okay luh.aft that was dinner time..lols.i feel strange being the only freshie going to eat with seniors ley.but just anyhow join in lo :X.then come home le.aiya cant elaborate more now.got homework.ltr tmr tio nag again ley.
and happy bday to jiaai :D:D muahaha.
be my sweetheart(: @ 12:15 AM
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
whee its 3rd week of school..while ppl in sec schs are having midyears alr.LOL.hm,nth much that i wld like to put here.schools kinda boring.and im lagging behind cos i seem to be gbing more often than not.
anws,realised that i really dun like to talk to my classmates.well..cos i dun talk abt stuffs like idols..and maybe my face is too serious,when i talk crap i appear to be serious.hahas.and im recognised for sleeping in lectures alr.try to change ba.
and i think.i still like her.
be my sweetheart(: @ 7:45 PM
PROFILE
Shenglong :D
16+ years old Date of Birth: 24June1992 Horoscope Sign: Cancer
loves
theres no need for love.
hates
myself.
wants
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contact
blur_sleeper@hotmail.com ADD me in MSN if you know me